“Please go far far, get lost and never come back!”
“Si Geen Nah…lu khi see ho la!” ( It’s better you go and die! )
“ Bo lor eong eh kia! Tey ho mian tui lai la!” ( useless child! It’s better you don’t ever come back!)
There could be no better way of destroying a teenager’s self-esteem than these harsh scornful words! Worse still, if these scorns are vociferated by your parents, the very people whom you depend on for love, subsistence, comfort and security!
Just for your sake, leempek's gonna betray all my fellow parents of the PAMI Association (Parents Are Most Important Assoc) now and leak out their secrets for all to know! (never mind getting martyred by your dads for shredding their macho image into pieces.. Leempek die also never mind… can then become Saint 9pek9bo!!! lol!!)
Okay..ssshhhhhh! Read this quietly.....dunwan to kena OSA ODSA (Orang Dewasa Secrets Act) la!
Secret No.1: Parental love is unconditional…
Which means, no matter how you failed them, they will still love you!
No matter what wrongs you have done.. they’ll finally forgive you and still love you!
You don’t have to send them roses with teddy bears they will still love you!
They love you without any terms & conditions attached!
(Charles, if you’re reading this…don’t get ‘oo-bin’ and take advantage of me!)
Secret No. 2: Their vocal cords somehow can never produce the line 'SON/DAUGHTER, I LOVE YOU!'
Most Asian parents, unlike their western counterparts are traditionally tongue-tied when it comes to expressing their love for their teenage children verbally.
You can ask them to do anything in the world for you….BUT DON’T EVER expect them (especially dads) to say that “Son/daughter, I Love You” line!!! They will melt by the mushiness and die instantly!
Ditto if you want your dad to hug you! It's 'NO NO' for their macho Asian dad image..they rather hug a ticking bomb!( dont fret ...it has nothing to do with the shape of the bomb and yours!)
So, without the constant verbal luv & hugs assuring them of parental love, most ‘si-geen-nahs’ assume their parents don’t love them that much….haizzzz! how sad! (errrrr.. maybe our Censor Board should also snip off those hugging scenes as not to mislead our teens hor?)
Maybe also, in addition to Father’s and Mother’s Day .. we should have some kind of Son’s or Daughter’s Day to celebrate where parents can send notes and gifts to profess their love for their children too. .... Ok, those in favor of creating this special day…say “aye!” here. (Note: Charles, You are not allowed to vote!)
Secret No.3: Parents are just as human as you..
No matter how ‘Rambo” strong, macho, wise and authoritative they portray themselves to be, or you were brought up to think they are…. parents are as vulnerable as you! Just like you, they can get scared, frightened, hurt, confused, frustrated and blur-sotong lost sometimes!
Secret No.4: Parents want you to have the BEST in life!
It’s their dream and lifetime ambition to see that you can achieve what they couldn’t. ( with their past failed experiments they now have a WHAT NOT TO DO handbook for you to follow and achieve! Good leh?)
It’s also their dream that you get what they couldn’t get or missed in life.. (they think you have better luck and opportunities or what?)
And……. that’s where the problem begins! You get pissed off by their strict demands and high expectation that’s mounting pressure on you.. and you go," WTF do I care what you want..it's my life..NOT yours!" " LEAVE ME ALONE! I already have one arse hole to shit with ..and I don't need any more in my life!"
TAHH DAHHH!!!! The most well kept secret of all…...
Parents really DON’T SAY WHAT THEY MEAN and DON'T MEAN WHAT THEY SAY when they are yelling their heads off in anger!
In fact,
“Please go far far and never come back!”
“Si Geen Nah…lu khi see ho la!” ( It’s better you go and die! )
“ Bo lor eong eh kia! Tey ho mian tui lai la!” ( useless child! It’s better you don’t ever come back!)
all mean the same thing! That is..
“ HELP! I LOVE YOU SON/DAUGHTER but I’M STRESSED, CONFUSED AND LOST AND DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO NOW! PLEASE HELP ME!”
Believe me…when parents reprimand or scold...they do it out of LOVE, CARE & CONCERN and NOT because they HATE you!
Basically, man has got only TWO feelings...HAPPINESS or FEAR. In fact, the underlying factor of all negative feelings such as anger, hate, jealousy, envy is nothing else but FEAR!
Your parents scold you for going out too often or coming home late ...because they FEAR you'll get into trouble, they FEAR you don't have enough rest and get into sickness and FEAR losing you!
When they scold you for not doing well in your exams ...it is because they FEAR that you will have a tough future ahead!( and errrrr..sometimes they also FEAR that nosy auntie next door bragging about her children!)
Now, if you catch no ball in what I’m trying to say in this post…”YOU BETTER GO FAR FAR and NEVER COME BACK!” LOLs!!!!!
4 comments:
yea...my mum alwiz ask me not to call her anymore and refuse to speak to me..some more want challenge me not to talk to her..aiya..5 minutes nia I mama here mama there d... =P used to it...same as my sis..we say things we dun really mean when we are angry.. =) Deep down inside we know we love each other and no way are we going to ignore and stop talking to one another.
hi, dropping by~
yea...i knew bout parents love us deep inside. but just my case is very complicated tats y i din't write it out in detail = ) anyway, pretty interesting blog u got, dint see much of these days ^^
Ping Ping,
That's the way it should be....My golden rule for relationship is 'ONLY ONE PARTY IS ALLOWED TO BE ANGRY AT A TIME'
Adrian,
you have good EQ..a caring person who tries not to hurt others. You'll surely see brighter skies after the storm is over. Keep in touch with us.
at first im catching no balls on what does this post means... read har read har... read liao now understand...
i as a child of my parents, at the young age of me, i was like... same as what u mean in here, wth, y care me so much... think is like tat, but at the end pain in my heart that i've such stupiak thinking of my parents, i should love them and not wth here and there...
at the age of me, the current me, i do very clear and very understand what does my parents want me to have a successful life and not a beggar life in the future. and i've realized that actually parents very the love their children even they yelling on them, scold them, pukul them... is because they are too concern and too care about them. they love them very much and scare losing them...
please guys and gals... dont try to fight back about ur parents when they scold u and yelling at u, try to think of their feeling and think of what have u actually did, only they will do such action to u... i do love my parents and i'm very understand their feeling to their children... i'm very sorry to them that ages back there, i did yelling and mouth fight with them, after fight with them, i also feel heart pain about it... i knew i was wrong...
but bear in mind, they are the one who feed u grow in this age... they do really love u as their children for sure forever... please do fight with ur parents and be more undetstandable to them and love them!!!
Post a Comment