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Tuesday, January 20, 2009


Oh my confusing Confucius! I just realized that it's only just 6 days to celebrating Chinese New Year! Borrowing this phrase from PE sufferers- "I know it’s cum-ing, but never expected it to be that soon!” should best described my situation here!

I am pretty alarmed, not because I am totally unprepared for this most important date my Chinese ancestors handed down to jerk me out of the mundane routine approximately every 365 days, but my lack of enthusiasm and excitement over it is making me feeling like I was born a ‘defective-Chinese'!

So thinking that perhaps I should get myself re-programmed to compensate for that missing ‘chingchong’ genes in me, I went online to read up on some chinky ching-chong Chinese New Year thingy.
There wasn’t actually anything I read I didn’t know except for the story on why we have the Lunar years named after the 12 animals. It seemed the Buddha (or was it the Jade emperor?) invited all the animals to a fete champetre to celebrate CNY and these 12 were the only animals that loyally turned up!

They were the Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Sheep, Monkey, Rooster, Dog & Boar and the rest just ‘ponteng-ed’ and kept poor Buddha waiting in vain ( that probably explains his standing, sitting and finally reclining position!). Swt! Somebody really should have introduced Noah to be his marketing manager back then.

My kap-siao son, Charles questioned the logic why it has to be the Rat instead of the Rabbit placed first and I quipped that the Rabbit didn’t actually want to go, but each time he rang to inform, someone on the other end said, "Mr.LABBIT YOU LING THE LONG LUMBER LA!”. lol!

I also read that the Chinese believe that the animal ruling the year in which a person is born has a profound influence on his/her personality, saying: "This is the animal that hides in your heart."

Err.. I don't quite agree to this 'One man-one animal character' personality belief. Irrespective of our birth year, we turn PIG-like all the same after downing enough alcohol and becoming horny RABBIT-alike in the privacy of the four walls afterdark and... all ladies turn barking
bitchDOG -alike if horny RABBITS are not generously compensating them enough!

I am also wondering did those other animals really didn’t turn up? Could they have just forgotten to sign the attendance book? I'm questioning the accuracy because many of us are already showing some characteristics of animals not found in the Chinese zodiac. We became nocturnal like BATs staying up late either blogging, surfing, chatting or gaming with a hand on a ‘mouse’ like a CAT, always hungering for more RAMs
like a starved LION and ending up the next day looking like Pandas!

Then again, we have politicians looking, thinking and behaving like DINOSAURS, all power but little brains surfacing these days while those with brains are prepared to jump like frogs!

Alas! It’s so darned Confucius-confusing! I guess even our Malay-brothers in Kota Trengganu are more convincingly chin-chong than I am. At least they have done with the throwing out the ‘RUBBISH” part last Saturday in preparation for the coming CNY and I haven’t even moved a finger! Damnit!

Among the many regular Chinese New Year wishes my late mum taught me when I was a kid, this "Nian Nian Yew Yuee" is one of my favorite. It means there is always abundance remaining! It also sounds like: "Having fish every year."

The funny thing about this phrase is that when read backwards "Yuee yew nen nen" it sounds like.... (ahem!...see mermaid for hint)

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